CLOWNS PC

[commedia]

look i will find or make a shitpost i will

Comments

[raws]

Oh, how interesting... To be reduced to a character in a story.

[ This place has just fascinating challenges. ]

Did you at least get to consummate your relationship?

[commedia]

Oh, no. [LONG SUFFERING SIGH.] Not at all. Apparently she was impressed enough to marry me in the story. How quaint. I think I would've liked to spend more time with her.

[Hot demon makeouts, destroying people, you know, the works.]

[raws]

Well, you are quite impressive.

[ He turns on the bed, propping his chin on his palm like a girl ready to gossip. ]

What was she like?

[commedia]

Flattery will only get you so many places.

[But no, please keep it coming.]

Mmm. Feisty. Flirty. Wanted to bring down an entire sect and take it over through brute force. Liked when people kissed up to her. Hahaha. She was fun.

[Its not like he actually would even fall in love with her, but she was entertaining, at the very least.]

[raws]

[ She sounds fun. ]

Quite the woman. But you had someone much better to keep your attention, didn't you? Faa-san.

[commedia]

Faa-san?

[Hmmmm?]

And who would that be?

[HE KNOWS HIM AS LUCILIUS, WHO IS THIS "FAA"]

[raws]

[ He's happy to sing his praises!! ]

Small, striking, with an alluring icy coldness... Possibly bleeding from the neck.

[commedia]

Oh? You mean...Lucilius?

[His smile curves upward.]

He was ever so grouchy during the entire thing. It was cute. Like seeing an angry kitten.

[raws]

[ That is Belial's favourite description of Lucilius ever. ]

The ever present challenge of trying to please him is what makes him so much fun. [ Hehe. ] It's rare to see him so grouchy, he must've been quite upset.

[commedia]

Oh, there's a reason he's upset.

[He leans in close, whispering like a high school girl telling a secret.]

He's been poisoned, you know.

[raws]

[ Whaaaaat?? ]

What did he do?

[commedia]

We were fighting this demon, and he just got whacked with something...well, honestly, I didn't see the whole thing. But afterwards, the System said he was poisoned.

[And he laughs.]

And you know what the cure is? Hahaha. I tried to offer it to him multiple times! He's thinking about it. You see, if he doesn't want to die...well, well! He has to have some form of sex. Isn't that funny?

[raws]

[ LMAO ]

Is that so? And he didn't want you?

[ Is Lucilius' life in danger... This is funny. ]

[commedia]

Well, he seemed to start considering it when we came back. I guess we'll see if he views his life more valuable than not letting someone have their way with him.

[raws]

Is that so? [ He's SO interested. ] And just how long does he have against this poison?

[commedia]

Mmm. I'm not sure, but probably only a few days at most?

[raws]

That's not much time.

[ He strokes his chin. ]

You need to get between his legs as soon as possible.

[commedia]

[He rests his chin on his hand, pouting slightly.]

He's so hard to crack, though. Mmm. I can charm a demon wife, but that man wants to make his grave and lie on it.

[raws]

Trust me, I know. I've had to live with him for hundreds of years.

[ Hmmm. ]

Perhaps you should charm him with actions. Bring him gifts, kiss his hand.

[commedia]

Ohhhh? You? Now you didn't tell me that I was stealing your husband, nnnn.

[He seems very amused by this, though.]

I don't even know what gifts he even likes. An antidote? Haha.

[raws]

Husband? He's more like... My father. [ ;) ] If you could devise an antidote I'm sure he would be completely charmed.

[ Here's a cursed suggestion: ]

Perhaps you could bottle your spend for him to take in lieu of sex?

[commedia]

Your father? My, my. Scandalous.

[and. belial. no]

Haha! I could see him now! He'd just toss it right on the ground in front of me!

[raws]

You don't need to tell him the exact details.

[ This would be SO funny. ]

[commedia]

Mmmm, perhaps, but I think at this point he wouldn't trust anything that comes from my hands.

[raws]

[ He sighs. ]

True. He's a prickly cat. How tragic he won't live to see his next birthday.